Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
