Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(315): View more from New York

I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him

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(305): View more from Florida

i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.

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(813): View more from Florida

He had one of those small greek statue penises

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous

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(850): View more from Florida

how was your day?

(404): View more from Georgia

fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.

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(+88): View more from

I swear the crows are laughing at me.

(1+88): View more from

You my friend are stoned into submission

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?

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