Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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