Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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