That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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