But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
