He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
