My pussy is not your playground.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
