the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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