Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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