I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
