And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
