sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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