I hate all girls vehemently.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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