What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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