did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
