Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Pants are for mortals
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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