3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
