Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho