Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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