And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I wear drunk well.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize