we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We are all done wearing pants today
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
