My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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