my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
