Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
