you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize
