we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
