I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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