1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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