It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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