Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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