I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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