I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
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Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
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I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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