it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
