David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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