do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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