Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
