I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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