Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball