I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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