I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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