Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
