what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
