I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
