Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
