Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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