i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
