Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize