is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize