i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize