I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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