Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize