Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
