I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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